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Fans of Life On Mars
Fic: None of Your Nonsense 
25th-Mar-2008 11:17 pm
Well, I've been an avid lurker for about a week, and now I've finally gotten it together to contribute something of my own. This is my first fanfic for about... two years, and my first time properly back on LJ, so please forgive me if I bugger up either.

Title: None of Your Nonsense
Author: alex_tremain
Characters/Pairing: Sam/Gene.
Rating: Green Cortina. I think. Do tell me if you think I should go one up. My own filthy mind isn't the best judge of such things.
Word count: 502, to be precise.
Warnings: None. Well. Bondage in the sense that handcuffs appear, but nothing you haven't seen if you've watched the show.
Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me, nor the setting, nor the idea, all that jazz.
General summary: Gene's listening to the football, and Sam is needy.

“Go on, Gene.”


“Genie… Please.”

“Don’t call me tha’. Only I call me tha’. Now let me listen to the ruddy match.”

They were sitting on the couch in Gene’s flat; Sam had come around, hoping for some fun, but he’d ended up being told to sit down and shut his little United-supporting-fairy-face while Gene listened to the football. Gene was sitting forward, elbows on his knees and eyes raptly fixed on the radio just in front of him, as if if he looked away, he’d miss something important. Sam had been trying to coax him away from it for ten minutes, but Gene was having none of it.

“C’mon,” groaned Sam, “you’ll find out the results tomorrow anyway. And you know Ci’y’ll win.” He slid an arm around to Gene’s front, trying to unbutton the bigger man’s shirt, but his hand was smacked away. Sam looked up at Gene, but he still had no eyes for anything but the radio.

“I’ll ‘ave none of your fairy-arsed Dorothy antics during the football, Tyler.”

Sam rolled his eyes, exasperation rolling off him in waves as he slumped back, arms folded as he stared at Gene crossly. “C’mon, Gene. Please?”

There was a pause. “Is it the only way to get you off me back?”

Sam grinned, unable to believe it. “Yeah. Yeah, it is.”

“Right-o then,” gene said, springing to his feet with surprising speed. He grabbed Sam by the collar and hauled him through into the bedroom. “it’s a slow spot in any case.” He pushed Sam onto the mattress, and the DI was only too happy to comply. Gene straddled him, pinning his hands above his head as he kissed him headily, and Sam gave in completely, putting up no resistance. Gene pulled back, eyebrows raised. “You really are bloody raring for it, aren’t you?”

Sam nodded, grinning. “Am a bit.”

Gene scoffed and leant over to the bedside table, keeping Sam’s hands pinned as he reached into a drawer and pulled out two sets of handcuffs. Sam’s eyes widened, as did Gene’s smirk. “Swiped ‘em; thought they might make things a bit… interesting.”

Normally, Sam would have liked to have been consulted before such a thing- after all, it was rather reminiscent of another time handcuffs had gone missing from the station… but he was far too surprised and delighted that Gene was complying with his desires to question much. Besides, the idea was appealing.

Being a police officer since the age of nineteen made you quite handy when it came to cuffs, and ten seconds of clinking metal later Sam’s hands were cuffed above his head. He looked up at Gene expectantly, smiling broadly… but it faded when he realised that Gene had gotten off the bed and was smoothing back his hair. “Gene?” Gene turned away, walking back to the door and opening it. Sam’s eyes widened again. “Gene, you bastard, don’t you dare-!”

“You can wait until bloody half-time,” said Gene, shutting the door behind him.
25th-Mar-2008 12:28 pm (UTC)

That is *so* Gene.

I really liked this little ficlet.
25th-Mar-2008 12:31 pm (UTC)
Thanks very much! <3

And let me just say- I ADORE your userpic. Lucky you indeed.
25th-Mar-2008 12:34 pm (UTC)
Oh, Gene, you sneaky bastard :D

What a great little fic to wake up to, thanks for posting!
25th-Mar-2008 12:40 pm (UTC)
Gene would totally do that. ♥ Lovely.
25th-Mar-2008 12:42 pm (UTC)
Love it - serves Sam right for being an annoying brat! And I love the image of Gene "watching" the radio (although I couldn't help wondering why he wasn't watching the match on TV).

The mood Sam's going to be in come half-time, I think Gene would be well-advised to leave him cuffed until after he's shagged him senseless!

Welcome to the comm!

btw I hope you don't mind a little concrit, but it should be complying with.
25th-Mar-2008 12:43 pm (UTC)
Oh bugger, you're quite right. Sorry, quite late, normal nit-picky self didn't pick up on that. Ta, love. And thanks for the welcome. <3
25th-Mar-2008 12:46 pm (UTC)
Haha, naughty Gene! :D

Half-time score : Gene-1 Sam-0
25th-Mar-2008 12:59 pm (UTC)
**giggles madly**

This has me smiling all over the place. I have no doubt that a man who would lock Sam up in his boot would cuff him to the bed for a little peace.

Sam as the halftime show makes for a very pleasing mental image. **goes off to her happy place**

Welcome and thank you for bringing the naughty.

Edited at 2008-03-25 12:59 pm (UTC)
25th-Mar-2008 04:27 pm (UTC)
Sam as the halftime show makes for a very pleasing mental image.

Agreed! Although DG is right, Gene might be best advised to leave Sam there until he's, er, finished with the performance.

Wardrobe malfunction, anyone????

25th-Mar-2008 02:10 pm (UTC)
Ha! Wonderful!! XD

*wanders off giggling to self*

(Hmm, can't help fast-forwarding to the end of the match).
25th-Mar-2008 04:31 pm (UTC)
This was delightful and funny! Thanks for sharing! And welcome to the comm, it's a great community.

Paranoid Park?
25th-Mar-2008 05:04 pm (UTC)
Hah! I love the fact that Sam is so desperate, he'll say that City will win - and that Gene was sitting and staring at the radio: true child of the 40's, isn't he? The handcuffing was a brilliant take - very funny, with the right dash of hot mixed in! Great ficlet!
25th-Mar-2008 08:02 pm (UTC)
Reallyreally great. :]
And I'm in the same boat as you, avid lurker, finally got me act together to join. Ah well.
I really loved this! And, even though I'm a lover of the angst, I adore the odd angst-free humourous fic. :)
25th-Mar-2008 08:31 pm (UTC)
Oh, bugger, kalypso. Really? xD Damn it. See, I have to admit, I know next to nothing about football, and all the sports I've grown up with have always had full radio commentary, even if they're playing live on the television.

Thanks for the tip, I'll remember it. I'll do me research more thoroughly next time.

And thanks so much to everyone for the welcome! I'm so, so glad you all enjoyed it so much. <3
26th-Mar-2008 12:20 am (UTC)
Alex, if you want to make sure kalypso_v sees your reply, you need to click on "reply" at the bottom of her comment and put it in there. Then she'll get the email notification. Personally, I always try nowadays to revisit fics and read through the later comments, but it's easy to forget, and thus miss interesting discussions.

Thanks again for the fic, and I'll look forward to the next one. No pressure there, then.
25th-Mar-2008 10:12 pm (UTC)

loved this.

(welcome to the comm!0
25th-Mar-2008 10:31 pm (UTC)
I can *so* see Gene doing that!

Welcome, hope you enjoy it here :)
25th-Mar-2008 10:54 pm (UTC)
Welcome! Have a cuppa and some pink wafers!

I knew where this was going but that was half the fun, watching Sam be so oblivious to it.

Thank you!
25th-Mar-2008 11:55 pm (UTC)
Hahaha, brilliant. And hello!

“Right-o then,” gene said ::shock:: No capital for Gene? He would be peeved... :0

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